"It's NOT About You!"

On November 7, about 40 people gathered at Trillium United Church in Cambridge for a day with Tom Bandy. Tom is prolific author and church consultant who has written over 20 books on the changing shape of ministry in today’s world. Last week, Tom focused on his

new book See, Know, Serve: The People Within Your Reach which looks at how churches can use advanced demographic information to better understand who lives in their communities and how to reach them.

I liken a workshop with Tom Bandy to trying to drink from the firehose. Tom fills you to overflowing with provocative insights and ideas. Sometimes it’s more than you can take in at one sitting.

Underneath what he says, though, are a few very simple principles.

Two that he spoke about last week are:

“All that matters is the Gospel. Everything else is just tactics.”

Or, we might put it this way: “The end is to bring people to an experience of God’s transforming power. Everything we do – including the church and all its programs and activities – is just a means to that end.” The end doesn’t change. But the means are always changing in response to new realities.
  

And ….

“Our key question is NOT ‘What must we do to attract those people?’ BUT ‘What must we change to bless these people?’”

Attracting is about what we need. We need people to join our present church so they can support its programs and its need for money and volunteers.

Blessing is about what people outside the church need. Of course, we also bless those inside the church. But the point of being blessed is so that we can share with others what we have received.

This is a very difficult mental shift to make. Most of us have grown up with the idea that we need to attract people to come to our church. Few of us have learned what it means give up what we have in order to bless people.

There is a high cost to choosing to be primarily about blessing. Jesus' life of blessing led

him to a cross. A life of blessing demands great courage. It requires commitment of time and resources, and a willingness to sacrifice so that others may be touched by the Good News. Blessing is full of risks – the risk of failure, the risk of rejection, the risk of having to give up things that are very precious to us -- of losing a way of life.

But we are coming to a point where the cost of staying in the “attractional” mode is even higher. The cost could be the end of our churches as we know them.

These words of Jesus have been on my heart this week:

“Those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake, and for the sake of the gospel, will save it.” Mark 8:35

It’s a paradox. We can try so hard to hold on to what we have that we end up losing it. On the other hand, when we are willing to let go of what we have for Jesus’ sake, we find true and abundant life.

As the stress level rises in a declining church, our instinct is to try to hold on ever more tightly to what we have. We fiercely resist changing our worship, welcoming the stranger, seeking the lost, letting long-cherished programs and activities go. These give us a sense of comfort and security is perplexing world of change.

But the price we pay for that is the loss of the church altogether. This past week, I have heard about three churches in our Presbytery who say they can no longer afford a full-time minister. In 2014-2015, we closed five churches. It is an undeniable fact that fewer and fewer people are interested in being part of our churches. Those who are interested are getting older and dying.

So, if holding on isn’t working for us, what would it look like to let go? What would it look like if we said, “What’s important is not what we want, what we like, what is comforting to us. What’s important is that we find a way to bless those who have not yet been touched by the Good News.”

What would it look like to say, “The church is just a means, a tactic. How can we put what we have to work in order to bless those outside the church?”

It would certainly mean taking the risk of getting to know our communities. Really getting to know them. Talking to people. Listening to people. Without a hidden agenda, but because we believe God cares for them. Maybe hearing some painful truths about how people see us.

It could mean radically reshaping how we conduct ourselves. What we do with our time. What we do with our buildings. What we do with our money.

It could mean recognizing that some of our present congregations can't change. They are too small and too old. Still faithful and precious in God’s sight. But they are what they are. But if they can’t change, what can they do to support and encourage those who can? Instead of devoting all their resources to just hanging on as long as they can, what if our churches found partners gifted and called to reach people in a new way, and said, “Here, take what we have. It’s at your disposal. We believe in you. And we will let go of what we have so you can be blessing to others.”

Jesus has a word for each generation. And I think his word to our churches today is: “It’s not about you. It’s about blessing those around you for my sake. Do that, and you’ll find true life.”